Anonymous asked: Did you ever fantasy about Noah before the two of you got together? For instance, pleasuring yourself to his image or imagining you were having sex with him when with other people?
((No…Jac never pleasured himself to Noah. But, he did imagine at one point a few of the women he took home were Noah. Accidental thoughts. Thoughts that just…slipped in at the very last second.))
((My friend and I are having a semantic crisis over the phrase “impressive erection.” Like, it appears on a not infrequent basis in fic. But what does it actually mean? Impressive compared to what, and by whom? Relative to the range of erect-ness an individual man can… exhibit, or compared to other men in (somehow) comparable states of arousal? Judged by the person with the erection or by witnesses?
What actually makes it impressive? Is it the speed at which the erection forms? Is it on a scale of one to ten?
Given that both of us are women, we are having trouble answering all of these questions.))
[I used to have a gay friend who enjoyed going into meticulous detail of his sex life with me. As I’m sure you know, the penis grows in size when becoming erect, and according to him the change depends on the guy and how aroused he is. I would image that the impressiveness of said erection is based off this, and most likely by the person witnessing it, compared to other erections said person has seen in the past? This is only my opinion, however, so I cannot know for sure. I suppose the truth can only be answered by the writer of the fic, as they are the one who believes the erection they have written is impressive.
This is a riveting debate, nonetheless.]
(….
Did this just happen? Sunday, why are you acting weird?)
((I’d…add my own opinion but Noah summed it up pretty nicely. If only add to the fact of “the change depends on the guy and how aroused he is.” *Shrugs* A guy can usually tell the difference between a…*coughs* regular and…impressive erection. It’s all on the feeling.))
((Look at what tumblr suggested.))
*He nods back, giving a soft smile in return, and he really does like the sound of it, the feeling it gives him to have his lover’s name entwined with his. Sometimes he can’t help but wonder if this really was what was best, if he really had changed the Spy for the better. Jac has always told him he was the reason he became more caring, but lately that caring has been called a weakness. Many will claim that Noah is not a bright man, but that does not mean he’s not observant. He’s seen his lover stumble back into their apartment late at night, more than just half drunk, trying to drink away that regret. A better Spy, more like Maurice. Hating the person Noah has made him into.*
*His head hurts now, the craving for nicotine making his stomach ache. He mumbles softly, excusing himself with a kiss to the forehead, before heading back inside. No, no, it probably wouldn’t be best for Jac to spend more time with him. He’s ruined him enough.*
Wha-? *He lets out a sigh as Noah excuses himself.* I suppose I said something wrong…*Jac curls his knees up around his chest, resting his chin against his knees, staring at the last rays of the sunset. A chill runs through him, Noah’s warmth gone and fast in fading. After a few minutes, Jac gathers the wine, chiller, and blanket, heading back inside.*
(Source: jacquesnaif)
(Source: jewfat, via justcallmeromanxp)
to-begin-again-jack asked: Run
*Bound and gagged to a chair, Jac sits under a dim light, the rest of the room nearly pitch black.*
April 27- Killed a family of 5, brutally murdering them all. June 29- Poisoned the food of an entire colony, killing everyone. December…25- Airdropped several bombs disguised as presents, decimating an entire plaza. *Jack peers up from the reports, judging silently.*
I…had no idea you had such a colorful past, Jac. I thought you were a man of justice. Of value. But…this? *He scoffs, disgusted.* No. You’re as bad as Maurice. Killing innocents. *He rises behind his desk, standing near Jacques.*
*No, there was no use in trying to break free of his bonds, spit out his gag, or even talk around it. It was useless. Nothing worked. And what would he argue? That those reports were a lie? No…no. Those reports were true. He did commit those monstrosities. He did kill all of those innocent people.
*But…he didn’t know…! He had no idea at that time the Brotherhood was corrupt. Or at least, that’s what he tells himself. There was that doubt. That nag that said that this was wrong, that they shouldn’t be doing this. But he did it anyway.*
*Jack shakes his head, peering down to look Jacques in the eye.* You killed all of those people. And for what? Because you were told to do so? How does that justify what you did? How does that wipe clean the blood splattered all along your past? In the end, you know you were the one to pull the trigger. To end all of those lives.
*Don’t you think I know zhat!? Zhat I know I was zhe one to end all of zhose lives? I paid for my crimes, Jack. Every day. Drank myself into a stupor. To a point where I couldn’t feel anything anymore. Saw all of zhose faces float by in my drunken ‘aze. Every innocent I ever killed, I see. I realized zhat did nothing. Zhat zhe only thing I could do was move on, and try to help zhose around me.*
*But it’s no use. Anything Jacques tries to say just comes out as a muffle.* And I supposed that’s your defense? Let me guess, ‘I paid for my crimes’? Pathetic.
Redemption is for the weak. For those who are still stuck in the past. The only thing you can do is pay for your crimes. To owe up and confess what you’ve done. Let all see the monster you really are.
*No…! I’m not zhat man anymore! Zhat isn’t me! Zhat isn’t fair! I shouldn’t be judged for the man I once was…*
*All that comes across is ‘That isn’t fair!’ Jack lets out a sneer.* Isn’t fair?! Tell that to the people you’ve killed! To the countless families you’ve destroyed! Explain it to them! Explain it to the child who’s left parentless because you killed them! To the mother who’s child was blown away from a bomb disguised as a gift! How is that fair, Jac?
*Jack’s staring Jacques dead in the eye, gripping the arms of the chair, the hate clearly seen.* And now. It’s time. To broadcast to the world what you’ve done. Every little thing. Every murder, every countless and and pointless death.
Afterwards…well…we’ll just let the mob that’s soon to follow decide what to do with you, shall we?
*At this point he’s not sure what else to say, because part of him needs this so badly, craves those little loving touches and good night kisses he’s missed so much. Then the other part of his mind tells him this is wrong, that he is forcing the man to give up something he shouldn’t, to put his life on hold for him. To love someone meant you only want to give them happiness, even if you had to make a sacrifice. Wasn’t that what Jac was doing for him now? No, no, he didn’t want that. Didn’t want to see his lover have to suffer at his expense.*
*It’s hard to accept an apology when there is nothing to be sorry for, when it should be reversed. There was no reason for jealousy, and he knew it was childish of him to feel that way. He had told himself this constantly, yet for some he still found himself growing more and more attached to his liquor and cigarettes, still found himself passed out on the couch so he could be there when the door opened. Jac loved him, this he knew, and this he clung to. Why did anything else matter?*
*The kiss to the ring sends a jolt to his heart, as if the two are connected in some strange actual way. Silently, he moves his finger to press against his lover’s lips, his voice that soft mumble.* … Noah Edward Naif Hughes.
‘as….a nice ring to it, non? *He gives a soft smile, staring at Noah lovingly.*
*This…was no sacrifice. No hardship on Jac’s part. He’s already changed so much because of Noah. No more late night drinking. No more self destructive behavior. He’s happier. More caring. Loving of those that have entered his life and happier because of it. That change would have never happened without Noah.
What’s wrong with a little more change? It isn’t a self destructive behavior. Rather, a means to make the relationship between the two stronger. It’s not like Jac dislikes Noah’s company. He loves it. Simply making more time for him isn’t a hassle at all. He was neglecting Noah. Spending more time with Maurice and Jack’s problems, training Oz and Narcisse, and being gone from home more often than not. Well. That’s going to change. Less time for friends and more time for Noah. Simple as that.*
(Source: jacquesnaif)
*He frowns even more, because this isn’t how he ever wanted to make Jac feel, to be that burden that weighs him down whenever he’s starting to have a good time. The Spy had used to be such a jubilant person, the nights they spent at the bar together when they were just friends never having such tight knots. Now he always seemed upset or stressed about something, and he couldn’t help but feel responsible with all the guilt he must be putting on the other man.*
*His lips linger even after the kiss has broken, not being able to pull himself away even with the way he’s feeling, and he knows he’s only making it worse by gripping the other’s hand into his.* I don’t want ya’ to change. I love ya’ just the way ya’ are. Ya’ don’t have to do anything special for me, alright? This is fine. This is more than enough. Ya’re more than I could ever ask for. I love ya’, ya’ know that. Just don’t… Don’t change.
*He shudders, a moment of his nightmare coming back to him. He grips Noah’s hand just as tightly.* I just need time away from my friends. For a moment to be with you again. More zhan a moment. I just…*He shakes his head.* I just need zhis. WIth you. I’ve been neglecting you and I know it. *He shakes his head again, pursing his lips.* You’re never a burden to me. Ever. I know I can always count on you. I can always fall back into your arms and know I’m safe. Know I’m alright. Know zhat you’ll always ‘ave my back.
What about all of zhose times you’ve saved my ass? Took care of me whenever I couldn’t keep myself together? Carried me home whenever I was too drunk to stumble my way there? I don’t consider zhat unimportant at all. It shows zhat you love me and zhat you’re willing to risk your life for me. I don’t show my love enough to you. And. I’m sorry.
I…can’t promise not to change. Because I will change. For you. To show you how much I actually care about you. And…I love you, too Noah Edward Hughes. *Gently, he picks up Noah’s hand, and kisses the ring that’s placed on his Fiancee’s ring finger.*
(Source: jacquesnaif)
[I can’t stop listening to Pink now, dammitass!]
(( :/ I’m sorry. I just D: It helps with the mood frame! Can’t…be listening to happy music for sad subjects. ))
